I have never really had the courage to let go of all control to a point where I had no back-up plan whatsoever. Of course that also includes letting my horse go in a huge field without any kind of fence and with the possibility of running away as far as one wants to go. That has always been kind of terrifying to me. Or at least it has ever since I became old enough to step into to age of worries… Things were different when I was younger. 5 or 6 years ago I did not think much about all the stuff that could go wrong. I just lived in the moment without all this thinking in my way. Instead I followed my heart and gut-feeling.
That also lead me to amazing moments with a mare I used to ride back in the days with whom I sometimes went for long walks alone with only a rope around her neck. Sometimes I would take of the rope and she would come along completely free. Sometimes we went off side by side and other times I would walk 5 or 10 meters in front of her. It didn’t matter because I felt how we were together. In fact I don’t remember ever thinking about “what if she does not come along?”. I don’t remember having those worries and I still believe that was also part of the reason why she choose to stay… That she choose to stay because I believed she would and never for a moment started having any doubts about it.
This whole thing of not overthinking and instead letting go of control has grown with me through the years. As I have become older it has started to become an obstacle in my life and obviously that also affects my work with horses. Therefore I also believe that is why things are different for me today when I play with my horses compared to my earlier. Reality is that it is way harder for me to let go of thoughts and control today than it was when I was younger. Not only do I find it harder to let go of all control like I do in this liberty play and just relax in the situation of not having any influence at all. I also like to believe that my problem with letting go of control and just have faith in the situation is actually a part of the reason why problems arise whenever I finally DO let go of my control. Let me try to explain…
When I finally let go of control I of course wish everything to work out perfectly. That is just a human thing I guess. I wish for my horse to pay attention to me. I wish for my horse to seek my company and join me of his own free will. Nevertheless that is not always how things turn out… What actually happens is that I get so obsessed with my idea of how things should be that I become stressed about it. I become impatient. I become bossy. I become tense in my body and mind. All of this because I deep down do not trust that things could work perfectly fine by themselves if I only dared to believe that they actually could. The thing that actually happens is that I become scared. Scared of not being good enough for the project to succeed. Scared of not being good enough for my horse to share his time with me when he has a possibility of choosing not to.
What I often see is that when I make peace within myself that everything doesn’t have to be perfect. That when I try to have faith in the project instead of overthinking it or worry about a bad outcome. That is the point where it all works out the best!
Therefore my message for you today is to have faith. Stop worrying so much about all the things that could go wrong. I promise you that no matter how much you overthink them they probably will go wrong either way if they are meant to and then you might as well enjoy your time without worries and useless thoughts on the subject. Enjoy your life people and live it instead of thinking your way through it. It doesn’t pays off.